Mr. Bitterman's Garden
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What You Do For Your Children

7/15/2020

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There Comes a Time
For Each and Every Backyard Farmer
When Imagination Takes the Lead
Over Sweat and Worry
And Knocking Hailstones Aside with a Jack Kramer/Wilson Tennis Racket
​ 
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One of the Pumpkins Decided
To Shoot a Frond Through the Neighboring Pine Tree
Which Left Us With a Baby Pumpkin
About 2 Feet Off the Ground
​

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With The Wrap from an Old Hose
And a Couple of Bungees,
I Made the Little Guy a Hammock.

Now, if He Turns Out to Be
One of the 200 Pound
Variety,
We'll Have to Re-Think
This...
​

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Once Again,
Some of the Borage is Doing Nicely.
While Others are Being
Sucker-Punched
By Voles and Pumpkin Vines.
​

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Today, the Game Became
"Do We Have Any Cucumbers?"
The Answer, After Some Searching,
Is
Yes.
​

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Yes, Mr. Cuke ​is in There.
Just Try to Find Him.
​
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And, While You're At It,
You Might Want to Find 
Furious George.
He Enlisted Becky to Help
With the Weeding,
Then, Disappeared, 
​Leaving Her to It.

He Re-Appeared an Hour Later,
With His Fingers Covered with Orange
Eating All the Cheesy-Poofs
Left Out for the Crow Buddies.

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Young Otis Gumpox Has Followed
Ivanka Trump's Advice,
"Find Something New, You Damned Slacker!"
And Now Works

In Downtown Lompoc
For Former Atty Gen Jeff Sessions
​

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Meanwhile, When Not Drinking
With the Bat-Shit Crazy Neighbors,
Furious is Busy
Getting Cheese Dust 
All Over My Comic Book
​Collection.

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As For Mr. Bitterman,
He's Hiding Out Somewhere
In the Butterfly Garden.
He Wants Nothing to Do With Any Of Us.

(He's Convinced the Pumpkin Hammock Was His Idea)
(Patent Applied for, US Pat Off. 27941)
​
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    Greg Moody is the long-time Critic-at-Large in Denver, CO. He has developed a love of raised bed gardening with the help of his simian assistant, Mr. Bitterman.

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