Remember the Other Day? Like, three days ago, When it was only 101-degrees? Then, 97? Then 91? Well, Today it is 39. With Low Tonight of 28. What One of the Local Weather Jockeys LOVES to Call: "A Killer Frost! Did you Hear What I Said? KILLER! Which is Par for the Course in Colorado. We've Had this Happen Before. It Will Happen Again, and, Likely, More Often, Given Climate Change. And, So, We Covered Everything With 9x25x2 Tarps From Amazon, (Who Now, Pretty Much, Own My Life) And We Harvested Everything We Could. Will the Late Tomatoes Make It Through "The Killer Frost?" Lord only Knows. (Though, Once We Had the Plastic Sheeting in Place, Fighting the Wind Every Step of the Way, The Weather Noodge Told Us to Use "Breathable" Tarps. There is No Winning with These Folks. (I Think They Wait to Tell Us These Things Because They Have a Kickback Deal With Amazon.) We Harvested Everything that Even Looked Close, From Petite Purple Potatoes To Hatch Chiles (68 now and Counting!) A Few Tomatoes (They're Still Slow) And a Few Last Cukes and Acorn Squash. And, of Course, Ten Quadzillion Pumpkins You May Recall the "Bungee Baby" Who Was Growing Through the Limbs of the Pine Tree? He Had Turned Bright Orange So We Saved Him From a Frozen Fate. He's the Bright Orange Pumpkin In the Upper Left Of This Photo. (Had to Save Him!) I'm Hoping We Get More, Especially From the Tomatoes, But We'll Have to See. It Has Been One Short and Screwy Season Down on the Farm. Speaking of Tomatoes, It Seems that Young Otis Gumpox Has Been Tasting All the Red Ones He Finds To Make Sure They're Ripe. We Spent An Afternoon Explaining to Him Why This Was Not a Proper Attitude in Backyard Farming Not a Single One of the Garden Guard Dogs Bothered to Step in And Stop Otis From Eating the Tomatoes. I'm Not Sure What Deal They've Cut But It Must Be Something Good Furious George Had the Bright Idea of Buying A "Little Firebug Just My Size Flame Thrower." He Decided to Sit Under the Plastic and Touch It Off Whenever the Temp Got A Little Too Chilly for the Plants. It Was a Great Idea, Even Through We Had to Cut Him Out of a Well-Sealed Package Of Plastic Wrap Come Tuesday Morning. As for Mr. Bitterman, He Was Momentarily Upset With Furious and the Flame Thrower, But Seeing that His Drunken Assistant Was Suddenly Vacuum-Packed, Wanted to Leave Him Til Spring, When We Could Open Furious "Fresh." We Couldn't Do It. They'' Just Have to Learn to Get Along And Watch Each Other's Shows in the Basement all Winter. At the Moment it's Between "Love Island" and "The Donna Reed Show." Also, While We Did Turn The Main Sprinklers Off, We Forgot to Check the Line To Our Stalin "Little Dictator" Water Feature. It Not Only Froze Uncle Joe, But Frizzed his Hair And Made Him Look Suspiciously Like Albert Einstein. Now, If You'll Excuse Me, I've Got to Start The Gas Grill With Furious George's Flame Thrower. See You Next Week. Likely, From High in a Tree In the Next County.
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